Friday, May 14, 2021

Page 246 - I Wanna Be An Armpit Prostitute


Greetings, fellow armpit lovers!  I must confess, tonight I'm so frickin' starved for pit passion, I'm actually pondering, "Hmmmm, maybe I need to become some kind of kinky sex worker to fulfill my needs!"


After a bit of debating with myself, I have concluded, "Yes, I wanna be an armpit prostitute!"

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WARNING:  Although NOT pornographic, the following subject matter is recommended for mature audiences only, at least 18 years of age or older.

DISCLAIMER: This blog entry is not meant to promote, shame or glorify sex work.  It is purely meant as a fun, fantasy essay written by an armpit loving dude.😈


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I invite you to press the YouTube play button and listen to an instrumental version of "Bad Girls", made famous by disco queen Donna Summer, as you read the rest of this blog entry.



Okay, just imagine a trio of sexy, shirtless studs, standing nearby, singing the song's tagline as they watch me search for my next client.


MALE TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!"




ME:  (Approaching a horny driver in his car.)  Hey Papi, you want my hairy armpit in your face?  ---  What?  Is it sweaty!!??  Well Papi, why don't you stick your nose in there and find out!

MALE TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Responding to the next customer.)  How much?...  Well, let me see your tongue!  Stick it all the way out for me, baby!...  Dang, is that a tongue or a python!!??  Okay baby, you can lick it for free!

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Answering the next guy who calls me to his vehicle.)  Why yes, I'm very discreet.  Don't be nervous,... Mr. Mayor.

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Assuring the shy guy in the driver's seat.)  Don't worry, Honey!  There's no shame in being an armpit virgin.  I'll guide you through it.  Let's start with my right armpit,... it's not as stinky."

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Chatting with the handsome business man who ordered his chauffeur to pull the limousine over.)  Hey Sweetie, tired of giving orders all day?  Why don't you take a break and let me give you commands for a bit?  Let's start by having your pretty face give my armpit some much needed attention,... while your driver watches!

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Greeting one of my regulars.)  Hey Piggy, does your husband know you're out here in the streets looking for me?  Check out my musky armpit!  Tell me, is this what you've been craving all week?  Is this what your hubby won't give ya?  Well, take a good whiff, Piggy!  ---  Yeah, breath it in deep!  Breath in hard!

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!"

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ME:  (Approaching the hunky officer who stops his vehicle to give me a warning.)  But Officer, it's not illegal in this state if I'm not charging.  Yeah, that's right, I lick armpits free of charge, or the men can lick mine if they want and it's all on the house.  ---  What?  You want me to get in your car?  Oh, how sweet of you to offer me a ride home.  ---  Oh, I misunderstood.  You want the two of us to drive around to the alley?  ---  But of course, Officer!  Anything for a man in uniform!  Especially one as fine as yourself!

TRIO:  "Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!  ---  Toot-toot!  Heyyy!  Beep-beep!
---  Bad boy, bad boy!  You’re such a naughty bad boy!  Beep-beep!  Uh-huh!  Beep-beep!"


[THE END]

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Well Pit Pals, thanks for letting me share my innermost fantasies with you.  I know at times they can be a bit kinky,... but something tells me, you don't mind a bit. 😈


(Pictures collected for the collages, as well as the pit pics used for this blog entry were all found online.) 

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I'd love for us to keep in touch!  So, I invite you to my main online platforms:

Follow my Armpit Lover blog, here on Blogger @Confessions Of An Armpit Lover . ---  Click the follow button on this page to keep up with the latest postings.

Enjoy more armpit entertainment on my Pinterest page @pinterest,com/enriquehenry100 .

You can also connect with me on Facebook @EnriqueHenryArmpitLover or on Twitter @enriquehenry100 .



NOTE: Click on the yellow links to get to each site.


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1 comment:

  1. I have a confession to make. The blog entry was inspired by a true event. Many years ago, when I was in my early 20's, I was dating a closeted guy named Wayne, who worked at a nursing home. We were spending one of his days off together, when he said he had to swing by his place of work to get his pay check. Wayne then announced that he had to first drop me off at a nearby bus stop to wait for him, because he didn't want his co-workers to see me and figure out that he was gay. Like an idiot I got out of the car and stood waiting at the bus stop in the hot Texas heat. At least I had worn a t-shirt and shorts to keep cool. Well, about 5 minutes went by, when a handsome older guy in a fancy car, pulled up next to where I was waiting. He thought I was a prostitute. I was flattered, but told him I was waiting for my boyfriend. Undeterred, the hunky hottie asked me to reach inside his car and pinch his nipple through his tight polo shirt. Well, I was so upset at my closeted sweetie that I went ahead and pinched that hard nipple with pleasure,... and EXTRA hard. He promised to drive by in a few minutes in case my boyfriend forgot about me, so he and I could spend some time together. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Wayne did return, but I will never forget my encounter with the stranger in the fancy car. 😈

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