Greetings, fellow armpit lovers! Boy howdy, I wish you would have seen the delicious dude I spotted at the supermarket this past Saturday afternoon! Wow, he wasn't human! He was more like a god, shopping amongst mere morals.
I first saw him inspecting oranges in the fresh fruit and vegetables department.
From the looks of his physique, the super guy takes excellent care of his body.
Now, I'm not one of those unscrupulous folks who sneak around taking secret cellphone photos of unsuspecting people. But dang, for this one instance, I wish I could be that shameless! --- The guy was drop-dead gorgeous, and I no doubt would have saved his pic as the screen saver on my phone.
I just needed a few things from the store, but I managed to do a bit of "beef cake" browsing once I collected everything on my list.
Believe it or not, I tried very hard NOT to stalk him around the store too much. However, it was hard NOT to search for him. One look at that sweet, stud muffin, and I simply hunger for more!
I honestly would not have been surprised to see several adoring female and gay male customers passing out in the isles, as the dashing Adonis passed by them. I know my legs got rather wobbly every time I caught sight of his stunning good looks!
Well Pit Pals, you know me. Although Mr. Terrific was wearing a t-shirt, and not a revealing tank top, that certainly didn't stop me from allowing several armpit fantasies to pop into my head! Especially when his muscular arms were in motion, lifting up items and putting them into his hand-held shopping basket. --- With strong arms like his, you know those pits are perfect!
Oh, how I wanted to walk right up to him and ask a few personal questions.
Questions such as:
"Excuse me! Excuse me!
I'm curious, do you shave your armpits or are they nice and furry?
Plus, do you have any photographic proof on your phone to prove it?
Maybe a shirtless selfie of yourself flexing?"
"Excuse me! Excuse me!
Has anyone ever asked to smell your underarms before?
I know we're strangers, but would you please lift up your arms
for a bit so that I may take a quick whiff? I'll be brief,
and I promise my nose won't even touch you."
"Excuse me! Excuse me!
It's evident you exercise regularly.
Please, tell me which gym you go to,
so that I may get a membership for myself
and see you workout!
"By the way, do you lift weights? I hope so,
'cause I definitely want to watch you lift those heavy barbells
and see your pits work up a mean sweat!"
"Excuse me! Excuse me!
You strike me as a guy who smells amazing!
Please, tell me which brand of antiperspirant you use,
so that I may go straight to the deodorant isle and
purchase the same brand for my own underarms.
I want to smell like you and think of you
when I get dressed every morning."
Tell me, how could anyone possibly be offended by my inquiries/compliments?
Well, I forced myself to continue the original task at hand and tried to focus on what I was wanting to get for dinner, not what I was wanting to snack on in bed.
Somehow, someway, I managed to finish my shopping and was ready to checkout.
As luck would have it, the marvelous, mystery man was at the self-checkout area the same time I went to pay for my groceries. I was waaaay too nervous and aroused to go to the empty register next to his.
As I scanned my groceries, my eyes kept wandering in his direction, hoping to get more info about the marvelous, mystery man. I knew my time was running short.
Usually, I have a habit of examining the items in a hot guy's grocery basket, but I was too distracted this time. Sadly, I was too far away to get a good read of his pant size. (I LOVE memorizing a fine-looking fella's pant or shoe size!)
I did however hear his kind voice call to the young female attendant. Something about him having a bit of problem with his register. (I guess even the gods have their troubles.)
He finished and walked out the door to the parking lot, with me following close behind. He got into his car and prepared to drive away. Hmmm, perhaps to his home to put away his purchases? --- Yup, you guessed it, I was tempted to dash to my vehicle and give chase, but I resisted, so as not to be so nerdy.
I guess I'll have to go to the same grocery store every Saturday, around the same time, and hopefully run into him again.
Maybe next time, I'll be crazy enough to approach him and ask him something simple like,
"Excuse me! Excuse me!
I noticed you smelling the oranges.
You seem to know how to select fresh fruit. Mind tutoring me?
Ummm,... and can we can pretend your armpit is an orange?"
By the way, since I didn't snap a photo at the supermarket, I logged onto Dreamstime and found photos of an unnamed über hottie, who reminds me of the super hunk.
Lastly, I'd love for us to keep in touch!
Please follow my Armpit Lover blog, here on Blogger @Confessions Of An Armpit Lover . --- Click the follow button on this page to keep up with the latest postings.
Plus, to connect with me regularly through my social media sites, or send a tip via PayPal, visit my all-in-one link page on Willow: @enriquehenry100 .
NOTE: Just click on the yellow link.
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