Greetings, fellow armpit lovers! As mentioned before, I love my sweetie, but sadly, he's NOT into pit play. Heck, he doesn't even like me getting close when he's sweaty!!!
Well folks, for the past several weeks I've had an unusually STRONG urge! I need to,... I have too,... I simply must smell some male underarms!!!
You know, I see thousands, upon thousands of pit pics online, but I NEVER get to fill my lungs with their alluring aroma!
Oh, alright, alright, I'll be a good boy and NOT have an armpit affair behind my sweetie's back. But, come on! I desperately need a fix!
Hey,... what if,... yeah, WHAT IF,... I simply find a workout buddy, for the sole purpose of being close enough to get a whiff of his sweaty pits!?
My neighborhood grocery store is in the same shopping plaza as a GOLD'S GYM. I often see Herculean hunks in their muscle shirts shopping for groceries after their workouts. Usually, they're strolling down the aisles with an equally good-looking gym buddy.
Hmmm, maybe I can find myself a buddy too!!! --- But not necessarily for workouts assists!
[Press the YouTube play button to hear an instrumental cover of the song "Physical", made famous by Olivia Newton John, as you continue to read.]
Wow, my mind is racing
with possibilities!!!
My workout buddy can be a drop-dead gorgeous Adonis or just an plain, ordinary Joe!
Heck, the guy can be gay, straight, bi, or an asexual male!
I truly can't believe I'm thinking this, but he can even have,... shaved armpits!!! I don't care at this point! Hey y'all I'm not kidding, my schnoz desperately needs a snort of some manly underarm stink as soon as possible!
If I get myself a buddy we can exercise next to each other everyday after work! I'll make sure to find a fella that doesn't mind working up a sweat.
Someone who doesn't care if I invade his personal space bubble, 'cause man oh man, I wanna get close,... REAL, REAL CLOSE! (The better to sniff him, my dears! 🐺)
I simply gotta inhale the fragrance of worn out, wet pits,... STAT!
Awww, the sweet fragrance of a hot, hunk's hairy hollows!
But hey, I promise,... NO SEX with my workout buddy, just sniffs! --- Would that be so wrong!!!???
Hmmm, just imagine all those after-workout selfies my bud and I would take, standing next to each other, flexing for the online looky-loos! All the while releasing our pit cologne into the atmosphere around us!
My nose would definitely get quite the workout as well! (Sniff-sniff! 👃)
Oh, the conversations we might have:
"Hey Brah! Let's take another selfie to record our progress!"
(Sniff! 👃)
"Seriously dude, you can totally skip the showers!
Your sweat don't smell like stink to me!"
(👃💓 Awwwww!!!)
(Deep inhale.👃 ) "Whoa, that breeze is great!
Nothing like filling up your lungs with the sweet smell of fresh,... um,... air!)
"Man, what's that intoxicating scent wafting through the air?
Is that pumpkin spice I smell?!?"
(Snort-snort! 🐷)
(Sniff-sniff! Sniff-sniff! 👃)
"Wha..??? Naw dude, I don't think I'm coming down with anything.
It's probably just allergies.
I think this wet locker room is the cause of all my sniffing." 😉
"Hold that pose, hold that pose! Yeah, just like that, buddy! Just like that!"
(Sniff! 👃)
"Wow, dude! Wait'll they get a load of our pits,... er,... I mean pecs!"
(Sniff-sniff! 👃)
"Okay, let's go ahead and flex BOTH arms for the next picture!"
(Whiff-whiff! 👃)
"Hey ol' chum, stand closer so we can both be seen in the photo!
Closer. No, closer. --- Even closer."
(Sniff-sniff-sniff! Sniff-sniff-sniff! 👃 )
"By the way bro, is that a new underarm deodorant you're sporting?
'Cause let me tell ya, you're rocking it!"
(Snif-fffffffff! 👃👃👃)
"Aw dude, we worked out so hard the stink of our pits
is gonna permeate this gym for days and days!"
(Snuffle-snuffle! 👃😈)
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
--- Well pit pals, I hope you enjoyed this blog entry and don't mind my naughty fantasies.
If I can't find myself a workout buddy, maybe I can get a job at GOLD'S GYM as the new laundry guy. I'd love to give all those wet, used towels a whiff, you know, to find out if they need pretreating.
(The photos, clipart, and gif used for this blog entry were all found online.)
I'd love for us to keep in touch! So, I invite you to my main online platforms:
Follow my Armpit Lover blog, here on Blogger @Confessions Of An Armpit Lover . --- Click the follow button on this page to keep up with the latest postings.
Also connect with me on...
Facebook @EnriqueHenryArmpitLover ,
NOTE: Just click on the yellow links to get to each site.
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