So, I've been dreaming up a soap opera about guys with armpit fetishes who live in a small college town named Pits-Burg. The town is known for its many craters created by a large meteor shower centuries ago. Nowadays, the more popular craters are found under the arms of its sexy, male population.
NOTE: You may first want to read PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#3) and PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#6) to catch up with this storyline. Simply click on the yellow links.
The story continues:
"CLIP" & THE BASKETBALL TEAM
Clifford Sweeney (mockingly nicknamed "Clip" by the basketball team) stands in line at the coffee shop located by the public square downtown. Slung over the young man's shoulder is his large, college backpack which contains various school related items as well as the electric razor he uses on the team's underarm hair, a clean white gym towel plus one empty, white plastic shopping bag. The bag is suppose to already have the fuzzy, underarm hair clippings of the squad's newest player, but something went terribly wrong earlier in the day.
As Cliff waits his turn to place his coffee order, his mind blissfully wanders to visions of Theo Duncan, his middle school crush who coincidentally now happens to be the latest addition to the college basketball team. In his opinion, the squad's newest member is also its sexiest member. He's funny and likable too.
Earlier this Sunday morning, per Coach's instructions, Clifford met alone with Theo, inside the team's locker room, to trim the athletic Adonis' underarm hair, since he starts practice tomorrow. Oh the thrill it brought the hopelessly single, student assistant as he sat near the shower, watching the lovely lad lather up and scrub his pungent pits before the trim. Clipping the player's underarm hair is not quite the erotic assignment one would think. However, seeing as Theo was being all flirty (even inviting him to brunch) Cliff was hoping to give the hottie much more than a trim. Maybe a tickle and a trim, or better yet, a deep tonguing and a trim.
One of the baristas places a freshly made coffee on the counter and calls out, "Order for Theo!" Immediately Clifford surveys the entire cafe and spots the handsome athlete, putting down a newspaper, then rising from a small table at the back corner of the cafe.
The two young men lock eyes. Clifford smiles with relief, but Theo's expression is one of disgust and he makes a beeline to the exit door. Cliff bolts from his place in line and hollers, "T.J., wait up!" He catches up to the runaway jock just outside the coffee shop. "Hey Theo, stop!" he pleads.
"Stay away from me, man!" demands the upset ball player, trying to hurry away. "I don't want anything to do with you or your perverted, money making schemes."
"Whaa,... how,... when!!!???" Clifford stutters in shock. In an act of desperation he blocks the furious fellow from taking another step forward. Cliff begins to speak in the sweetest voice he can muster, "Okay, okay. Hold on a minute, please. Can we just talk? What happened back at the locker room? Why'd you leave? We were getting along so well," he reminds the obviously hurting young man. "I left to go unlock the gym door for Coach, but when I returned you were gone without any explanation. Coach sent me to your dorm room to see if you were okay, but no one was there."
The nostrils on Theo's pretty face start blaring, "Oh I'll gladly tell you what happened. You left your cell phone on coach's desk when you went to get the door. While you were away you received a very special text. The alert tone was some crazy can-can dance song and the screen lit up with a message from some guy named Gilles."
"Oh crap," Clip remarks with a hint of panic in his voice.
"Now, I don't make it a practice of reading other people's texts, but the tune was so crazy that it got my attention. I glanced over at the screen and saw that Gilles messaged you something about your new b-ball player's pit hair bringing in 'beaucoup dollars'. Well, I'm the new b-ball player and you were about to trim my armpit hair, therefore I assume you were planning on getting some fast cash selling off my discarded pit fuzz."
An embarrassed Cliff stands silently as his heart breaks.
Theo continues, "Back in middle school we use to call you 'Good Ol' Scheming Sweeney'. I'm betting that since you're the team's armpit barber, you've come up with some harebrained plan to fetch a load of money for all the players' underarm clippings. Probably selling it to horny admirers. Am I right,... Clip!?"
"Look T.J., I really like you. You know I have since back in the day," Clifford gently begins. "So, if there's any chance something might ever develop between the two of us, I have to tell you the truth. I WANT to tell you the truth, the whole crazy truth." He takes a deep breath and begins his confession, "Yes,... I was planning to use your clippings to earn some major money."
"I knew it, you perv!" Theo interjects.
Although hurting inside Cliff continues, "I'm pretty sure you won't believe me if I just explain it to you, so I want to show you what's really happening and maybe you'll forgive me and somehow understand."
"Oh, I already understand," the enraged student responds. "You were a crazy money hungry schemer when you were 12 years old and you're still one today." Theo turns and tries to get away.
Once more he's blocked by Cliff. "Listen buddy, I may be tiny, but I'm scrappy and waaaay stronger than you," he informs the jock. "Not to mention I'm wearing the latest and coolest running shoes on the market, so I can out run you if you try to take off again."
Theo snarls, "Stop trying to charm me."
"Is it working? Am I killing you with my cuteness?" he asks with a desperate smile. "Please, just follow me." In a surprise move, Clifford lovingly grabs hold of the beautiful baller's hand, and leads him across the street. Just as surprising, Theo does not pull away. No other guy has ever held his hand quite like this before. Even with all the frustration and confusion, there is an undeniable spark between the two men.
They head in the direction of the apartment Theo briefly visited earlier, only they aren't going to the upstairs apartment. They stop at the door to the art gallery located right below.
[NOTE: Read PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#8) for insight.]
The sign in the store's window reads, Gilles' Art Gallery. Cliff pounds loudly and repeatedly on the door. A tall male figure inside rushes to undo the lock. He opens the door shirtless, wearing only the loose linen pants he likes to wear when working on his paintings.
 |
| "Gilles" |
The middle aged man has a body so gorgeous it would put most college athletes to shame. "Sacre bleu Clifford, what is the matter? Why all the banging?" he asks. "And who is this!?"
Cliff rushes the pleasantries, "Theo this is Gilles, Gilles this is Theo Duncan. He's the star basketball player that just transferred from up north."
A look of worry come over Gilles face, "No, no, no mon ami! Oscar is not going to like this one bit. I'm sorry, but you both need to leave. Right now!"
"Who's Oscar?" Theo inquires, but his question is ignored.
Clifford apologizes, "Forgive me Gilles. There's something I have to do." Still holding Theo by the hand, he barges past the bare-chested owner in the doorway, then hurries to the back of the gallery. Cliff is afraid to let the young man's hand go, for fear his long-time crush might run away again. Plus, holding onto Theo gives him the courage he needs for the big revelation to come.
They arrive at the locked door to Gilles' private work space, but the panicked Frenchman tries to stop them, "Clifford, please!" Determined to get in, Cliff appeals to the artist, "I'm sorry friend, but I need Theo to know the truth or he'll never trust me. I have feelings for him and I must keep him from hating me." Gilles sighs and reluctantly unlocks the door. It swings open and the two young men enter.
There, displayed on giant easels and hanging on the wall are 11 homoerotic paintings, featuring a colorful roster of college basketball players portrayed with their arms raised in different game poses. In the center of each subjects' open armpit looks to be actual hair trimmings which match the color of each team member's head of hair.
Theo is stunned, "What the hell!!??"
Clifford releases his grip on the young man's hand and steps to the center of the work studio to explain, "Coach put me in charge of trimming all the players' underarm hair. He doesn't know it, but I've been collecting all the clippings from the guys and bringing them to Gilles so he can bond the hair onto the armpits in each painting." The handsome, middle aged gallery owner closes his eyes in disbelief. Their secret is out.
Theo is so dumbfounded he can barely utter his next question, "And how much money are you getting for all this?"
"Since you just joined the team your portrait is the last of 12 we need. If Giles can paint a picture that's similar to your likeness, then add your actual underarm hair,... Cliff pauses realizing the enormity of his confession.
With eyes watering from a mix of disappointment and anger Theo yells, "Tell me, I demand to know! How much money are you getting for all this pit porn!?"
Clifford sighs and whispers his answer, "Over two million dollars."
[TO BE CONTINUED.]
All photos for this blog entry were found online. Featured as my fantasy cast for this storyline are (pictured below, left to right) Robin James as "Clip", Nathan Owens as Theo & Giles Marini as Giles.
Interested in more naughty, underarm drama? Simply click on the following yellow links to read related soapy stories:
PACO & HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW, PAUL
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#1)
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#4)
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#7).
TWINS DAVID & DARIO
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#2),
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#5)
PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera (#8).
Or for an easier way to follow all the stories click "Follow" at my Google Collection entitled PITS-BURG: An Armpit Soap Opera .
Visit my Pinterest page for more armpit entertainment @www.pinterest.com/enriquehenry100 .
Feel free to leave a comment below and share you own pit memory or fantasy. Plus, don't forget to press the "Follow" button to keep up with my latest posts.
NOTE: This story is entirely a work of fiction. Any similarity to any persons (living or deceased) is strictly coincidental, and no identification of any kind with any such person is intended or implied.
No comments:
Post a Comment