Greetings, fellow armpit lovers! Well friends, summer is officially here! That means hotties in their summer bodies will be snapping bare-chested selfies to ensnare admirers, entice followers, and encourage thousands of likes and retweets! However, in my opinion, many fellas need some fine tuning when it comes to their photography skills.
Therefore, I've invited my online buddy and professional photographer, Paul S. Wilson, to join me for yet another conversation about underarms. He's a quirky, creative artist, a trusted friend and confidant, whose artwork I've featured on my Facebook page.
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| A fun, retro-looking masterpiece recently posted by Paul. It features the artist and his manly muse, Lee. --- I love it! |
So students, let's all get out our pencils and notebooks as our little PIT CHAT begins...
ANOTHER CONVERSATION WITH PAUL
Well Paul, summer is here! Gay and straight men are shucking their sweaters and long sleeve shirts for tees, tanks or going topless. Many will take photos of themselves, in various sexy underarm poses, and post their pics online for millions of hungry eyes to adore.
First of all Paulito, I was wondering, have you ever posted an armpit selfie?
Oh heavens no! MUCH too modest for that. Once, for an online dating site, I staged some profile shots where I was in a tux, with all of TWO buttons of the shirt undone. That was around 1990...2? ...3? --- Scandalous!
And you, Enrique? Any armpit selfies?
Well,... confidentially,... a few years ago, when my sweetie was away from home, running some errands, I secretly snapped a couple of underarm selfies in my bathroom. This was around the time I started posting on the Internet about my passion for pits. I sheepishly shared the private photos with a few choice online followers, and they in turn shared theirs with me. 😈
I cropped my pictures to expose me from the neck down only, but no lower than the waist --- similar to the avatar of my current online profile.
However, I have since stopped sharing private pit pics, because of work related reasons. I don't want to end up being the hot topic around the workplace watercooler.
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| "And it looks like he never trims his hairy pits!?" |
Also, I've quit sharing my sexy selfies all together to avoid provoking my sweetie to contact the nearest divorce lawyer. Although my guy is sweet and kind, he is SUPER, SUPER jealous, and believes a husband should only share views of his "private bits" with his spouse, behind closed doors. That's real romantic and all, but since he has absolutely no interest in participating in any kind of pit play, my armpits are always aching for attention.
Interesting he would consider those "private bits", but then in a way, I do too. And that is why I enjoy seeing them by accident in public. I feel as if I really am seeing something I shouldn't be privy too and it is kind of thrilling.
Yes, the same with a hairy stomach! I love it when a guy in the checkout line fumbles for his wallet in his front pocket, and absent-mindedly lifts his shirt a tad to get there... Might as well be a strip tease right there in Lane Eleven...
THAT topic can be another aspect of the Armpit Selfie, is the Peekaboo Approach! Because who doesn't love the underside of a bicep and some fluff peeking out of a sleeve?? I know it drives ME bonkers! Maybe more shy-guys would take Pit Selfies that way, if they had SOMETHING on but allowed us to see in a bit.
Hot-cha-cha-cha!!! LOL, you and I think so much alike!
Well, today I'd like to discuss armpit selfies, from the point of view of a photographer and fan.
You know, it seems like every time I scroll through my social media feeds, I inevitably come across several sexy, shirtless studs sharing their self photographs. Many of them proudly featuring their underarms, for which I am forever grateful! However, most of the snapshots are in desperate need of major editing or retakes.
Often I find myself yelling at the screen, "Come on guys! Level Up your armpit selfies!"
Allow me to share some samples of my frustrations, and hopefully you can discuss ways amateur photogs can make improvements.
EYE CONTACT
Now Paulito, you know I LOVE me some pretty pictures of pitters! I have spent countless hours surfing the Internet to add thousands, upon thousands, of pit pics onto my social media sites. However, I tend NOT to save armpit selfies if there is a cell phone in the photo. --- Guess it takes me out of the moment. --- I prefer pit pics where you can see the face of the model, whether he's a GQ magazine model or just a regular Joe.
Cute as he may be, I don't like it when the guy is looking at himself in the camera and not at his audience. --- Correction: I confess, I HATE, HATE, HATE IT when he's not looking at me!
When I was working in retail, I once casually dated a younger, super sexy, co-worker who loved to dance on the salesfloor to the Pop Muzak being played over the store's PA system. When I took him out dancing to a popular gay bar, he spend most of the evening dancing to his reflection in the mirror, instead of looking at me! I HATED IT! Our relationship went south real fast after that outing.
As Glenn Close's character said in the film FATAL ATTRACTION, "I'm not going to be ignored!"
Yeah, I think I would have fled the bar had that been my date - after one or two attempts to break him out of his "Angie Baby" moment and it not working, I would bail.
Now, I too would prefer not to see the phone or camera. Even if you can tell one arm is out of the picture and likely holding the camera I would rather see that than see the device taking it, and yes, he should always be addressing his audience, unless he wants to be looking off, out a window, or something a little more 'artistic.'
Staring into an obvious camera is as off-putting as a Skype or Zoom session where the other person is clearly staring at their monitor and NOT making eye contact! Drives me nuts, I hang up on them! 😄
Amen! Preach it, Paul!
I'm reminded of the first nudy magazine I bought, back when I was a closeted 17 year old.
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| The Legendary Johnny Harden |
My favorite horny hunks in those pages were the ones that made me feel like they were posing just for me. Raising their arms, because they knew, without a doubt, that that would turn me on! 😈
Yes, and again I liked the ones where the focus was not ON the armpit but by default you saw one or both because of the pose - if it were a double page spread I would tear off the half with the 'junk' and focus on the upper half! I only kept the mags with the pretty pits.
I STILL have some of those tattered pages! Some were of a tennis player from "Inches." Others, all Playgirls... --- Aww, the money we spent in hope of one, good shot! No pun intended! 😆
Next, I'd like to share a specific photo of a dude that turns me on (you know how I love lads who wear glasses). However, his selfie really lacks intimacy...
He's too far away.
Absolutely no eye contact and he appears emotionally distant. The image takes me out of the fantasy. 😢
You know, before we move on to the next subject, might I add, an inexpensive tripod can also help make the camera "disappear", thus enabling more eye contact. --- Or try rigging something up, using books or boxes.
LIGHTING
Now Paul, you're a professional photographer. Let's say you were writing a book called, ARMPIT SELFIES FOR DUMMIES. As an artist and photographer yourself, what technical advice do you have for aspiring, armpit selfie photographers?
Lighting is always key - and is not always easy to set up unless you have hours and time to take many Pit Selfies - natural light is great as are natural, non distracting backgrounds - foliage, forest, mountains, even a nice jogging path.
The sun does great things with hair, look at all those professional model shots where they are backlit. Wouldn't it be cool if you could accomplish that with armpit hair? It's tricky but it can be done. Sunrise and sunset are the best times, when the sun is low and easy to step into; it is also known as "The Golden Hour".
At those key times and is the most flattering natural light you can buy for free, which makes outdoors so great!
I'd like to discuss a rather randy armpit selfie (seen below) which I found online and shared on my social media platforms. It features the handsome, hairy hunk "Adjective Otter", @adjectiveotter on Twitter. His hot pic got lots of attention from my online pit pal community.
At the time, you posted an interesting commented about this photo:
"Lots to look at in the foreground AND background here! Some Fantastic Thatches on this boy, and a Trail that just keeps on trailin'! Look at the grips on those chair legs, that thing isn't going ANYWHERE! That strip with the cord in it, yikes! I'd be trippin' on that thing... and look! A bouquet of white flowers, abandoned and on its side! Plastics perhaps? One can only wonder! Very provocative in every way!"
So the surroundings definitely got your attention, which we'll cover next. But, you also mentioned to me that it looks like he did not use a flash for his photo.
Yes. Sometimes as a photographer I go as far as to say "Okay NOW a few with/without the flash!" to make doubly sure I get all the details or not. Sometimes natural light and no flash is preferable and more flattering.
LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION
A good realtor and a good photographer both know that location matters!
If you are self conscious about your Pit Stop, do as others do, and try it in the gym (guys do more astonishing things in there after all with their phones) and try to get a track light aimed in there- think artsy in your pose. Greek statue, male model, whatever you feel like that "Sexes-Up" that pit!
Again, try to avoid busy backgrounds, lockers, etc., and remember to CROP if you can, we want to see that pit, not the rows of weights or the towel shelves!
A tastefully decorated large bathroom, foyer, living room, if you have access, is also fine. Wet pits? We love 'em, and that's easy enough at the source- in the shower!
You are usually guaranteed a plain or tiled background that is perfectly in keeping with the theme.
Speaking of bathrooms/restrooms, may I make a request of the audience? Guys, defer showing toilets/bidets in your selfies. It adds a "stinky" element to the story. The only smell I want to think about is the aroma of your armpit and body bouquet.
Same goes for dirty hampers. Your senses focus on the clothes, not the underarm.
Oh, and one more thing to add. Fellas, before you snap that selfie,
Clean Those Mirrors!"
A quick FYI for the audience: Windex, window cleaner, comes in travel size wipes, to clean all your murky motel mirrors, and grimy gas station restroom reflectors. 👍
TAKE MULTIPLE SHOTS
This next subject is VERY divisive between me and my friends. You see, I'm a strong believer in taking multiple shots.
As a professional photog, please tell us why this is important.
Don't be afraid to take dozens of photos. Good photographers know that to get one, sometimes you gotta take a hundred! But don't stress --- have fun with it and that fun is bound to come though in one or two great hot shots! Ha-ha, edit as necessary! I could go on and on of course!
I have my own picture taking rule: No less than 3 shots, sometimes of the same pose! Family and friends grouse at me about it during social gatherings, but let me tell ya, when you compare all 3, there is ALWAYS 1 best photo, either because in some captures all eyes are open, or better smiles, and many times the focus is clearer.
WHAT'S YOUR CHARACTER?
William Shakespeare once said “The eyes are the window to your soul”. For armpit selfies, do you think a bit of acting is required?
Oh, maybe, yes. You don't want to put on too much of an act or it will look forced. I love to see smiles, hence my repeating "have FUN with it!" If you crack yourself up that might make for the sweetest photo of them all! If you like stoic and serious, it will come naturally, particularly if you shoot a few and loosen up some.
I swear, sometimes I see a blank the expression on a selfie subject and sob, "Dude, you're posing for a sexy picture, not your driver's license photo!"
And if you DON'T fancy your face, go for a fabulous pit close up - shooting it in a mirror might be easier, too (but remember to crop out your phone if you can). You have a better chance at controlling lighting with a close-up too, as far as literally standing RIGHT next to a bare bulb if need be to pick out all those hairs or highlight all those wonderful contours in there!
GET CREATIVE
Not everyone can be an armpit selfie Picasso, but hey, everyone can at least make an effort to be creative.
Similar poses, similar expressions, similar bathroom settings. To me, many of these armpit selfies are becoming "monkey see, monkey do." --- Oh, how I wish more guys would try to be creative! By the way boyz, creativity is sexy! Seeing another copycat is a big yawn!
I agree. No matter how hot the hunk may be.
Guys, think outside the box, be creative and have fun!
THE "PIÈCE DE RÉSISTANCE"!
[NOTE: pièce de ré·sis·tance {pē-ˌes-də-rə-ˌzē-ˈstän(t)s} - French term for "the most impressive thing."]
May I make a confession?
Of course, confessions welcome!
I confess that I absolutely get turned on when I think a guy posts an armpit selfie with the intent of making the audience,... shall we say "fill a sock" to his pic.
To me, most selfie dudes just want to show off, but the true MASTERS of the art form have the ability to have the photo practically demand you pull down your pants and pay homage, right then and there!
For example, this photo of singer Nick Jonas is my favorite armpit selfie of all time. And let me tell ya, I've seen lots of armpit selfies in my time!
I don't even own a Nick Jonas recording and couldn't name a one of his hit singles. Yet, years later, after viewing it for the first time in 2013, and even after collecting millions, upon millions of pit pics, this is still my #1 me fave!
Tell me, what is it that you love about the Nick Jonas photo?
Now, at the time, I knew of Nick from this various TV appearances and photos posted online. However, this was the first time I saw the typical nice boy's naughty side. And man, oh man, he was proud of his workout accomplishments, and knew what he was selling,... and exactly who was buying! --- I have no doubt he knew pants and panties were going to go down for this armpit selfie!
So, now Paul, would you please put on your photographer/artist/armpit lover hat and comment on the picture?
He has "just-enough-hair, every-where." Pits, chest, happy trail, and just that subtle bit of pubic hair peeking over the waistband, one of my favorite motifs.
He has "just-enough-hair, every-where." Pits, chest, happy trail, and just that subtle bit of pubic hair peeking over the waistband, one of my favorite motifs.
Color wise, his glow is truly rosy and postcard-perfect pinkish-orange; the shading picks out his contours nicely and the pose does not look forced and he is in a sensible, neutral background. Whatever the "effect" is that was used on the photo works in its favor to set him off from the background and give him an aura.
Wow, I could converse with you all day and never get bored! Thanks so much Paulito for agreeing to another Pit Chat.
Thank you, this has been fun!
I always appreciate your opinions and insights on anything photography or art related,... and of course, on the subject of men's armpits. 😘
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Well, Pit Pals, I hope you enjoyed this new conversation with my buddy, Paul. I'd love to have another one soon. To read our previous conversation click the following link:
In the mood for some cool, quirky art?
Then, please make sure to click on the link and follow Paul on Facebook: Paul S. Wilson .
Plus, check out Paul's creative and quirky YouTube videos: Crashing Crockery .
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(I selected most of the selfie photos for this blog entry from my Photo Gallery on Facebook, which originally were found online.)
Lastly, I'd love for us to keep in touch!
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| Hanging on the wall are the Progress Pride and Armpit Fetish Flags. |
Please follow my Armpit Lover blog, here on Blogger @Confessions Of An Armpit Lover . --- Click the follow button on this page to keep up with the latest postings.
Plus, to connect with me regularly through my social media sites, or buy me a coffee, visit my all-in-one hyperlink site on Willow: @enriquehenry100 . --- Just click on the yellow link.
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